‘Tis the season for the beginning of the book of Luke. It’s a beautiful story of the birth of Christ. Most churches end the story with the last verse of Luke 2: “And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man” (v. 52).
This leads to an interesting question: How does one grow in favor with God and with man?
We tend to think of these as two separate things, but the reality is that the same character traits that bring favor from God often also bring favor from people (at least, it brings the type of favor that is Godly – favor from ungodly people for doing ungodly things isn’t something I want, anyway). The even better news is that when we’re in a healthy state of growing in favor with God, it will keep us from the temptation to grow favor with man via performance, self-effort, and pretending to be something we’re not.
Note that when we’re growing in favor with God, we’re not trying to garner His favor, attention, or love by the things we do or even become. We’re already dearly loved children of God (1 Peter 2:2, 1 John 3:1), holy and dearly loved (Colossians 3:12), heard by our Father (1 John 5:14), have God’s eye (Psalm 139:1-2), and so much more. We already have favor from God because of what Christ did on the cross. But we can still grow in favor – well, let me explain.
Favor has two definitions in the dictionary. The first, we already have from God: “Approval, support, or liking for someone or something (esteem, goodwill).” (For example, Luke 2:14, which speaks of goodwill toward men, on whom God’s favor rests.) We have that through the blood of Christ. The second we also have in some measure: “An act of kindness beyond what is due or usual.” Jesus didn’t have to die for us, but he did it “to bring us to God” (1 Peter 3:18). Another definition would be, “Overgenerous preferential treatment (unfair preference, partiality).”
When we receive favor from God or from people, it often looks unfair or preferential. For example, some time ago, a company contacted me to ask if I would review one of their products on my blog. I agreed. This was preferential treatment – not everyone (and not even all travel bloggers) on Instagram got this offer. I considered myself blessed with favor (as well as a couple of hiking products I like very much and was easily able to review highly). Favor pulls our heads above the rest of the world; it makes us stand out because we’re getting an unfair advantage, whether we deserve it or not. This advantage should be a blessing for us in some way – often financially or socially.
So now that we have the basics down, let’s get into a few practical ways we can intentionally grow in favor with God and with man (people).
- Learn to steward favor. Many people receive favor, but only those who steward that favor well receive more favor (generally speaking – some people just get a lot of chances to steward favor well). Favor builds on favor, so learning to steward well the favor that you receive (no matter how small) is one of the best ways to grow in favor.
- Be authentic. Act like yourself and who Christ is within you rather than trying to imitate other people or “be popular.” This also eliminates trying to curry favor with others by acting in a way you think they want you to act. God sees to the heart (1 Samuel 16:7) so trying to “fake it” with Him never works well.
- Be diligent. This does not mean doing everything with extreme perfection; it means showing up and doing well with the things that God has called you to do. It also means understanding “good enough,” integrity, and priorities and being able to demonstrate these qualities with graciousness.
- Honor others. If you can’t demonstrate honor, chances are that you also won’t be able to steward favor well.
- Learn to accept honor from God and others. This goes against pride and the way we often look at ourselves. So the first step may very well be to learn how to accept honor from God. This is not prideful thinking that you’re invincible or perfect – it’s humility that looks at ourselves through God’s eyes and sees what He sees. It’s also the ability to graciously accept a compliment, make others feel your appreciation of their honor of you, and in private give God that honor.
- Live honorably. No one wants to work with a foolish, rude, ungrateful person. Living honorably (which is pretty much defined as Godly living) will draw people to God in you as well as allow you greater access to God and His heart.
- Cultivate relationships. It’s amazing the amount of favor that comes out of relationships. Don’t make the mistake of trying to get into a relationship due only to what they can do for you – that’s the opposite of authenticity, and it’s universally hated, especially in the business world. Relationships are two-way streets, and you both should be benefitting in some way from the relationship.
- Be generous. This includes using your favor and influence to give others favor. It’s true that you reap what you sow (Galatians 6:7), and that includes favor.
- Face trials and setbacks with joy (see James 1:2-4). Joy and hope help to overcome negative situations, and resistance will make you stronger – and more able to steward favor.
- Cultivate truth in your heart. When you know the truth, it sets you free (John 8:32). It also makes you able to distinguish between the truth and a half-truth – which in turn grows your relationship with God and helps you display wisdom in every situation.
Do you have any other thoughts on how to grow in favor with God and/or man? Share in the comments!